Success Through Healing; An Unexpected Life Changing Experience

June 26, 2017 IN Business, Entrepreneurship, Journal, Spiritual

Find your purpose and it will never feel like you have to work a day in your life

Since embarking on my entrepreneurial journey in late 2013 after transitioning from a career as a remedial massage therapist, it feels like I have done a full 180-degree circle. The first big course (and only other one to date, other than my tertiary education) I did was in 2014 when I initially wanted to become a life coach. It was a pivotal moment for me in really kickstarting my spiritual journey, at least one I was consciously aware of. And it wasn’t the “green smoothie, active wear” kind of journey which mind you, put me off the whole thing until I learnt it isn’t about that at all. For me, my spiritual growth has been so integral to the growth in my business, like yin and yang it hasn’t been able to exist without the other.

Each of the big courses that I have invested in has really been an opportunity to dig deeper to my own truth and heal the parts of myself that are just waiting to unleash itself out into the World, to serve others and make an impact. And that takes time, patience and a whole lot of self – love.

This journey has also inspired me to want to work with healers, coaches and conscious driven entrepreneurs and business owners whose mission is to serve others with heart, build a platform with soul and make a difference in the World. It was in 2015 after yet another abusive workplace incident within a healing practice actually, go figure that I decided to finally do things on my own and become a VA (and not work full time for anyone else again).

It was during that time I felt more drawn to digital marketing and strategy work (interesting because I graduated in marketing and business at UNI in 2012 but hadn’t pursued it in the Corporate World). It was also a time, I felt a strong resistance to really work on my own healing and spirituality preferring instead to focus on my work and business which became my anchor and a huge part of my joy (it was probably the best distraction to my personal problems, a great way I thought to distract from the pain I was experiencing in my life at the time).

It wasn’t until early this year after yet another relationship break-up and big life change that I decided okay that’s it, “It’s time to break the cycle!, let go of past conditioning, learn to breathe, find peace and calm and integrate more of this crazy woo-woo stuff into my life!” (Never would I have imagined I’d be so into angel cards, enjoy meditation and crystals now!)

And so I have worked with a couple of spiritual coaches to help me release some of my own baggage since (sometimes they will find you) which led me to be ready to join Soulpreneurs. I have to admit my first reason for joining was to refresh my knowledge with business and marketing and to learn something new. It also helped I felt a connection with Yvette, the course founder. But what I gained has been something much more than I could ever imagine. So special and life changing, both personally and professionally.

And then just recently after a magical four days away in Byron with my Soulpreneurs tribe, I’ve been reminded that the healing and growth work doesn’t really stop and in fact, it is necessary to help you get to that next level of success whether in your life or the work that you do. My experience over those days has been testimony to that as I went through my own breakthrough and mini transformation within myself. It was unexpected, it surprised me. And it has been life changing.

I have never ever spoken on a stage to a crowd of people before (and if you know me, you’ll know I’m working on my courage with this) but at this event I did, and with confidence too!. It has always been something I was afraid to do. And with the encouragement and support of my fellow Soulies, I did it. And the feedback was great.

I witnessed crying, and incredible breakthroughs from others too during our days together which has been so beautiful to see others share their stories so openly.

I’ve always been a deep thinker and observer of life and I feel like I have spent my life absorbing and integrating a lifetime of lessons since experiencing an almost fatal breakdown that happened over a decade ago. I believe we all go through what we go through for a reason, it all leads us back to the path we are meant to be on and sometimes it feels like a 180-degree circle until we get the message from the universe and it all starts to sync in like an accumulation of “ah ha” moments. And sometimes it takes huge events in your life to get a real perspective on what’s important.

And to me, finding your passion and then sharing that with the world can be one of the most important things you can do for yourself. There will be challenges and doubts along the way but usually it is our greatest work that will provide us with the most resistance. I cannot think of another group of women other than my own Untamed tribe who I would want to continue this journey with.

Soulpreneurs is a community and course to support you as you grow spiritually, step into your purpose and build a successful career doing what you love!

Yvette Luciano brings two decades of experience in marketing, events, business and a wealth of knowledge including personal experience to deliver a program unlike anything else that teaches you everything from:

Building a profitable and soulful business
Growing your platform and brand
Writing books and becoming a published author
Speaking and sharing your voice through events.
And more ..

As an official Soulpreneurs ambassador I’m proud to offer complimentary business and branding mentoring when you sign up using my unique link here and mention I referred you. Please contact me for more info. *t&c’s apply

The course offered is one I have experienced and can highly recommend whatever stage you are at. You can also enroll at any time & complete the course in your own time. It doesn’t matter where you are located. The support both physically and online including the value you’ll receive from the community is priceless!

JOIN SOULPRENEURS & RECEIVE BONUS MENTORING WITH ME

join Soulpreneurs using this unique link to receive bonus mentoring with me. Contact Tess for more info. t&c’s apply.

With love,
Tess

Do not make the mistake of underestimating authentic relationship marketing

June 3, 2017 IN Business, Entrepreneurship, Marketing

Today I logged into LinkedIn after several months.

Hit with about 20 automated messages from people I have had no prior connection with, I quickly skim read over it. Some looked like a personal message at first glance but after working with others in the past who used this tactic heavily to get new clients, I was already aware of how it all works. This is a reason I am not active on that platform. It feels icky, cold and always like you’re being sold to. And it always amuses me when these people try to employ the same tactics on other platforms. Applying the same tactics that may work elsewhere does not always equate success on other platforms.

Welcome to the new spam trend, coming to a social media platform near you

It’s already happening with Instagram and it irritates me. What’s worse, It’s being taught and encouraged by so-called top marketers where automated spammy messaging is the latest trend. They are saying things like, “why bother commenting or liking other people’s posts. You need to be direct messaging people and getting them on the phone”. Okay, so this can work when done appropriately, sparingly, consciously and in the right circumstance.

However in many cases, such tactics don’t work when a relationship hasn’t even been developed. One word, YUCK. Can you feel the ickiness?. Network marketers are often taught to do this, write a list of names whom they can contact and then follow up. Because according to them, it works. Yes, that’s because their targets feel cornered, lack the confidence to make their own decisions and are often at a desperate need seeking the help from a so-called ‘expert’.

I can pick three things from the top of my head that may lead to potential issues for the business pushing these tactics:

A) The messages are usually scripted so for one it feels cold and distant. It is disconnecting, not connecting.

B) The relevance of the conversation has not been established so the responder is probably confused as to how it will add value to their specific situation or problem.

C) This method has been used for years and years, It’s just been tweaked to suit the social landscape but there is nothing social about it. It just feels like a telemarketing call and often targets vulnerable business owners who don’t know a better way.

Some will argue, it has worked for many years. ‘Don’t reinvent the wheel’.

I am going to argue, the space in which we do business is rapidly shifting and unless we adapt, tweak and respond in a way that is relevant to the market, it just won’t work. It’s like fitting a cube into a round hole. In this example, the cube space is the traditional marketing space. And the round hole is the digital marketing space. And the cube itself is marketing tactics employed from the 80’s. It doesn’t fit.

After being in this space for a few years now, I can predict how this system works whenever I am in the situation. I know exactly where the conversation is going, what the agenda is and the tactics being employed. It’s a huge turn-off. Because you don’t feel like you’re being listened to or understood (two key ingredients in great communication). I’ve worked with a number of coaches in the past who had very successful careers in the past and were trying to employ the same strategies from 20 years ago. They were wondering why things weren’t picking up but were adverse to change. Remember the analogy from above? That is the simplest way I can explain it.

There’s the popular style of events too that employ a similar icky funnel system and It’s overused and I can tell exactly how It’s going to go down as soon as I step into a room. I could tell you what will happen next when at these kinds of events. I can also smell someone’s agenda a mile off (yes even through a computer screen) and I switch off immediately if I feel like I am being pushed especially when there hasn’t been a relationship established or no prior effort in engagement. And I know just like other conscious entrepreneurs I’m not the only one.

I call it the ‘Spray and Pray’ Effect

It’s like throwing a huge fishing net out hoping to hook as many eager fish as possible.

But people are catching on fast, things are shifting. Have you noticed?

There’s a rise of conscious entrepreneurs, courageous enough to not follow trends, soulful entrepreneurs, awakening, going against the norm, daring to be different.

It’s time to shake things up

A lot of business owners are so scared to do things differently, not trusting their own instincts or following what they know to be true to them so terrified they will get it wrong. I’ve been doing things differently, taking risks since day 1, watching, observing, learning, and doing things that work with integrity (and soul). And so have many other conscious entrepreneurs.

Guess what? I have not had any issues getting business. No, I am not a millionaire (yet), I have not invested in ‘get quick’ money schemes or courses that teach you how to become rich (although I have been poached) but if that is your only goal in life, then I am not the person for you. That is not what I teach. I teach others how to communicate to connect and stand out authentically online to attract their dream tribe and clients organically with sustainable and long-term success.

What’s my secret

Being real, and interested in others, listening to my audience and getting really good at communication and relationship marketing.

Focus on relationships (without an agenda), Be yourself, don’t give into trends so easily, let WOM spread, make an effort to engage and as a result, guess what happens?

The momentum will build and you won’t have to push so hard with your marketing efforts. Eventually, clients and customers will be drawn to you because you were true to you, they followed your journey and connected to your story and how you relate to them. You let your real authentic magic shine through and were brave enough to stand out.

If you’re not interested in communicating and building genuine relationships authentically, forget it. And in the words of Gary V:

“You cannot underestimate people’s ability to spot a soulless, bureaucratic tactic a million miles away. It’s a big reason why so many companies that have dipped a toe in social media waters have failed miserably”

If you’re keen to learn more about communication that connects and how to be more confident in sharing your story and message, check out the mini course I offer over here

Have a great weekend!

Big love,
Tess

Why I do What I do & My Bigger Why

April 5, 2017 IN Journal, Spiritual

When you’ve been to the edge of life and have nothing to lose, you think “why the hell not” and realise you have everything to gain !!

There are so many of us who are deep but don’t feel comfortable to share and you know who suffers the most? Young people in the school system who are trying to make sense of their emotions, those who feel deeply but aren’t getting the support they need.

In some cases, this will lead to suicide because people no matter who they are, young or old, rich or poor, straight or gay cannot cope or have the tools or skills yet to deal with the intensity of it.

If I can help or inspire just a handful of people through the words I share, through the work I do to help them find meaning and a sense of purpose in their everyday so they don’t have to live a life just settling in a World that’s sick, constantly wandering “what if”?” – It would make me truly happy. For me, that would be success.

After being hospitalised during my HSC year at 17 and then again at 18 and losing all my friends and who I thought I was within that year, I felt so alone and really fucking angry on a mission to seek answers.

Answers that I couldn’t find from doctors, psychologists or counsellors (and I went to several including other healers and therapists) about what the actual fuck happened to me, why and how can I prevent it from happening again. I would only be met with blank stares.

So I stopped trying to get help & went inward and found a lot of answers there throughout the years. Only a few people know the actual story of what happened to me over a decade ago and even fewer actually get it. And one day when I find peace and closure with it all, I will write a book.

The next level of my journey has really only just begun.
As My spiritual coach put it, “It’s like you’ve been spiritually orphaned, a lost wanderer trying to find your home”.

During the years that followed my hospital experience and in my desperate attempt to find a reason to want to wake up, get out of bed and live, I discovered Yoga and Natural Therapies and even became a massage therapist because I so wanted to help heal others.

My healing journey began only to realise years later I’m just a lost soul trying to find my place, in huge need of real spiritual guidance. But I wasn’t ready. I still had a long way to go, fucking hard challenges I had to face before I was ready to fully open up and really do the work required to get aligned and anchored to my truth. And the work continues but I now feel at home, like I am at a place where I feel a sense of belonging.

A few years later (3 years ago now) after graduating from Uni, I found the thing that gave me purpose. I found healing through my writing and sharing my story which has led to further growth and opportunities.

Having directly experienced the consequence of long-term chronic stress & illness, I just don’t believe there’s any point in pursuing work that makes you miserable and sick. Some people don’t get it & it is just an unreachable fantasy because they haven’t been to the edge of life yet.

I continue to pursue the work that lights me up because I have experienced that darkness to the point of near death. It really is amazing what you attract when you’re courageous enough to go where your passion is, when you do what you love and not give up following the things that inspire you.

It’s in that moment when you’re at the edge of life, stripped away of the beautiful yet simple things in life you once took for granted, you realise you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I get it and I understand the pain, the joy, the challenges one goes through when you choose this path.

That is why It’s my mission to help others feel aligned to their purpose and what lights them up and share their message and story with confidence so that they can make a meaningful impact through the work they’re most passionate about ❤️

What you might not know about me

February 5, 2017 IN Journal

There’s a big reason why I do what I do and in addition to being a creative junkie and completely obsessed with the work I do there are other things about me you may not know –

After 6 years in business, 3 of which had been online – I knew there was more. I felt restless and my soul craved more freedom, I needed to find a way to make a more meaningful impact so I set out to explore what that meant. And along the way my passion for what I do growing stronger.

Today I am still on the journey of discovering who I am. And every day I aspire to live The Untamed Life and hope in sharing my message, will inspire others to live their version of it too.

And here’s what I believe –

When you have the right mindset & the courage to dig a little deeper to your truth & get real with yourself, I believe you open yourself up to more possibility, with access to more freedom and abundance – a feeling born from within that cannot be measured by external factors like money, material possessions or physical appearances.

I’ve had the privilege of coaching everyday soul seekers through their life and business transitions. I believe when we collectively work together, we have the power to make a bigger impact in this world. And I truly believe every single one of us has the potential to make a genuine difference. But the work starts within.

There’s been a few significant events in my life that have influenced where I am today. Major events like that really help you learn to appreciate the important and simple things in life + navigate challenges in order to rise above and thrive..

I am mostly passionate about

inspiring others to courageously make a living doing what they’re most passionate about and live their truth, where they feel a deep and lasting sense of freedom, abundance and like anything is possible. And how to transition through challenges with more ease and flow whether it be in their personal life and or career/business.

People have told me –

I wear my heart on my sleeve, I’m brutally honest but mostly I’m extremely loving and kind. I am a minimalist, to be honest I’m content with very little at all and I cannot stand clutter. But I am a Sagittarius so I like a bit of adventure, and I ain’t afraid to let it go if my soul has to compromise.

What else can I tell you –

Not to be mistaken as a weakness, I have more fire dragon in me then rainbows and unicorns, ha!. I enjoy old school R’n’B like naughty by nature and Notorious B.I.G. I can’t help but get up and dance when I hear those beats. I prefer writing over talking. I’m confident yet shy with a habit of losing my words sometimes. I value my time and don’t mind a glass of wine and a big greasy burger from time to time. I dislike small talk but always up for a d’n’m, You know those juicy, soul quenching convos with your girlfriends where you are left feeling on top of the world. I’m down for that. I’m also down for anything that nourishes the soul and raises the vibes!

Where did it all begin –

I began my entrepreneurial journey initially as a life coach when I made the transition from my previous career as a professional remedial massage therapist and decided to start a blog in late 2013. Since then, my journey both personally and professionally has evolved and transformed significantly that’s seen me take leaps of faith and make plenty of mistakes too but it’s all been worth it and I wouldn’t change a thing.

One of my big loves is writing –

I’ve been doing it since I was really young but not in the academic sense.

If I had kept on listening to the negativity around me and not trusted in myself, I wouldn’t be doing what I do now. I was a C grade student so I never really felt confident with it or pursued it until I decided to start a blog.

I get inspired by ideas, conversations and situations that trigger my ability to write on a particular topic and it will just flow. And that’s how I work with clients. It’s about expression, connection and communicating a message that speaks from your soul and resonates with your audience. To me, this is essentially what authentic marketing looks like. And we are marketing ourselves, through all channels of communication even when we don’t think we are!

But my life hasn’t always been smooth sailing –

There’s been a few significant events in my life that have influenced where I am today like a complete breakdown at the age of 17 where my whole body and nervous system shut down and it almost killed me (but sparked my journey into wellness & alternative health), a failed marriage by the age of 28 and one abusive workplace situation after the other. Major events like that really help you learn to appreciate the important and simple things in life + navigate challenges in order to rise above and thrive.

If there is one thing I’ve learnt, It’s that we are responsible for creating our own realities and the life we want. But we also hold the power to change it. At any moment!

Don’t Let These Things Hold You Back This Year

January 31, 2017 IN Business, Journal, Spiritual

Last year was a 9 year, a year for completion and learning the lessons we needed to learn so we could enter 2017, our 1 year without carrying all the residue forward with us or repeat past behaviours and mistakes that don’t serve our highest self. And if we haven’t learnt, the universe will make sure we do!

This year is also an exciting time for change, new beginnings, new creations, new possibilities and for starting over. Many people have packed up, moved on or are beginning a new chapter altogether. But if we are to grow, It’s important to make sure certain habits don’t hold us back from expanding and reaching new heights. Change is uncomfortable but it is in this discomfort that growth takes place.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed but for many of us, a lot has moved very quickly, things that we have been working towards have already begun to manifest and it can feel quite overwhelming, in a good way but can also leave us feeling drained. If there were loose ends to tie up from last year, it might have left you feeling like you were moving through sticky mud. I know this is how I felt. Now, as February approaches, a lot has settled down and we can finally let out a big sigh of relief that the best is still yet to come.

It’s also a great time to do a self-check, get accountability from a friend and watch your energy levels so that you remain grounded and strong as you build on the foundations that will carry you forward this year. My friend Kirsty from The Mystic Wanderer has great resources to help us understand the astrological changes and energy shifts that take place that may affect our life and business. Kirsty has personally helped guide me through some turbulent transitions while processing through some pretty hectic shifts and changes within which occurs naturally as you grow out of your old skin and shed the layers that may be holding you back. And for me, it all happened at once but I still did my best to show up.

There are always infinite possibilities and opportunities for us and we always have the choice to change direction. At any moment. But are these 6 things still holding you back?

IMPATIENCE

This is a biggie. We have to remember, things happen in perfect timing. It may not seem like it but we have to trust it is. It’s because of the lack of patience we have that prevents us from being in the moment, enjoying the process and actually achieving the goals we want to achieve because we’re too quick to give up just because something hasn’t happened at the time we decide it “should of” happened. Sometimes we have to just let go of the outcome and enjoy the ride because it is in these moments when the magic happens. I recently wrote about how learning to be inlove with my time has made all the difference and shifted my focus to appreciate the journey more.

SELF – AWARENESS

This is a pretty big one too. This is not an excuse to be self-conscious but rather, self-aware. Being self-aware allows us to look at our behaviour patterns, habits and how we present to the world that may be hindering us from moving forward or achieving our goals. Being self-aware could also be the difference between not achieving the outcome you desire and actually achieving it with much more ease and grace. Could there be another way to handle or deal with a tricky situation? Is there an alternative solution? Is there another way we can approach a certain scenario to get the outcome we want. This can be a difficult practice and by nature, it may challenge our current beliefs or perceptions and force us to change.

JEALOUSY

It’s only natural to get jealous from time to time but when it is unhealthy or we let it go too far to the point we actually resent our friends it can become toxic and actually destroy healthy relationships. And the worst part, those who are highly intuitive can pick it up. It can lead to feelings of hostility, hatred and resentment towards others but all it does is hinder our own growth, feelings of happiness and success because we become too outwardly focused on what others are doing, we lose sight of our own unique beauty and talents. And it has the potential to sabotage good friendships, create distance, distrust and feelings of abandonment from those we love without meaning too. However, when we stop comparing and in a state of true contentment and learn to love who we truly are while being at peace with all our imperfections, we are less likely to be hindered by jealousy. And thus are no longer held back.

BOUNDARIES

When we learn to say NO (with grace) to certain things and situations that don’t serve us or add value to our lives, we have the opportunity to protect ourselves and teach others how to value us or treat us the way we deserve. I don’t mean like a scene from a Jackie Chan movie where we get our warrior sword out & get all ‘kung fu’ on someone. This can be difficult for those of us (me included) who just want to do the right thing by everyone. Sometimes when you say NO to someone it can feel like you are being the mean one. Or at least that’s how you can be made to feel. Some people won’t like it because they were comfortable with you always being the ‘yes’ person. But sometimes It’s just necessary to preserve your energy and say NO. And I always like to remind myself, those who matter won’t mind and those who mind, don’t matter.

FOCUS

Where our mind goes, energy flows. Where is your mind right now? Is it important right now in this moment? Could it be left for a later time? This is such a HUGE one and something I have struggled with too. When there is so much to do, time can get away with you and then all of a sudden you’re left thinking where the hell did all my time go? We naturally put so much pressure on ourselves to get all this stuff done in one day and we only end up exhausting ourselves. I am no organisational expert so you will have to find your own way that makes you feel focused and productive. But what works for me is scheduling out my day the night before or first thing in the morning and prioritising tasks, what has to be done today and what can be left for tomorrow or next week. And the question you need to always ask yourself, is the task taking me one step closer to my goals?

BELIEF STATE

Earlier in the year, I caught myself questioning my self-worth and I just couldn’t shake this low vibe feeling. Maybe it was all the loose ends from last year I was still trying to sort out like a pending tribunal case with my current real estate agent (our case against them), a big payment I was waiting on receiving or the reality that whom I thought was a good friend didn’t really care at all and the weight of this and trying to process through the heaviness just killed my vibe. Looking back, I can see so easily a belief state can rapidly spiral out of control and go from reality to fantasy very easily if we don’t manage it. Don’t get me wrong, belief states are very real but it can also impact us in a very real way. And usually what we believe about ourselves manifests outwardly and creates the reality in which we live. Without getting too deep or carried away, a belief state can be the difference between achieving our goals or staying stuck and if you are aware that these beliefs could be a result of past conditioning and may not be true then you have the power to change it.

Certain situations and events will cause us to change, whether it is a current limiting belief, a new perspective or a completely new space or environment in which we find ourselves. Being hit with the truth that something needs to change can be even harder. Wherever you are, know that change can be positive and is usually always essential for our own growth and development.

“Truth and courage are not always comfortable but they are never weakness” – Brene Brown

Please share with me in the comments if there was anything holding you back and what has helped you with your breakthrough?

Going Against The Grain & Lessons In Business

December 21, 2016 IN Business, Journal

I used to believe if I had the plan, bought the business cards, the website, the logo, invested in a coach, and followed the steps- that’s it, I’m set!

Everything would stay the same and build from there but as I changed so did my business. No one shows you or teaches you how to navigate through such transitions. There was a lot I had to go through to get here. I’ve learnt heaps and will learn more as I continue to grow. But most of the lessons have been through taking the action and just doing it, anyway ..

Finally, I feel really good where I’m at, things are flowing and it doesn’t feel as hard. Yes challenging, but in a positive way. And there was a lot I had to go through to get here. I’ve had to restart and build momentum from scratch a few times & most of the lessons have been as a result of just doing it, my own way which I am grateful for because unless you have tried and failed, the lessons won’t sink in even if it is taught.

The following was advice I received last time I was on a call with a potential coach whom I followed for a while and one of many reasons why I still have not invested in a coach.

“If you’re not getting any likes on facebook, that’s a bit sad”

“If you want to get the business, you have to message them directly and get them on the phone right away – don’t wait for them to find out where to book in for your services” …

“You’re not charging enough”

I admire her no BS, straight to the point approach however this is why I don’t agree 100% with what she says:

A high number of likes DOES NOT equate to a thriving business. Likes will not convert your audience to buy from you. Consistent quality content, providing value up front, making your audience feel significant, giving what they want without expecting and showing up for them on your chosen platforms on a daily basis is what is going to convert. I could pay for likes but is that going to build an engaging and loyal tribe? Ummm NO. Have you ever noticed a fan page of over 100k likes but when you scroll through the feed, there is no engagement on the posts…That’s because there are companies who have a $100k budget to spend on these things to make themselves look like an authority. They may not lack the money but they lack substance and soul and that my friends, you cannot buy.Many of my higher paying clients were following me (without prior engagement) for a while before they reached out to work with me. And guess what, I didn’t even have to try because the trust and credibility was there. They did the stalking, knew what I was about, did their research and when the right time came, there was no need to use “pushy” tactics. It was just as simple as “Okay, so let’s hear about what you do … great, this is what I have to offer” – – “Great, let’s go!”. Zero hesitation. Why? Because a relationship was established. I worked out after the call that infact I had been interacting with this lady in groups. Maybe not through my page but in other ways. So it is really important to think outside your bubble and think of other ways you can establish rapport and relationships. Do not just focus on your fan pages. It’s true facebook is making it a lot harder but the potential within the online space is so much bigger than that.Now, you might be thinking Okay that’s great Tess, but I don’t want to wait 1 month, 3 months, 6 months to get clients. And with the shocking algorithms I have no choice but to pay for sponsored ads etc. Well, there is truth to the algorithms, and yes there may be times when you need to pay for sponsored ads. But there is a strategy with when and how to do this. And before you do, you have to be clear on why you are doing it. But It is simply silly to solely rely on ads to drive your business. There is another way, a more holistic approach but it will take more than a day, a week, or even a month before you start seeing results.Gary Vaynerchuck recently shared in one of his talks, that lack of patience is why most people fail. And this is so true. Most of us buy into the 90K in 90-day concept without doing any work prior and believe if they simply follow the formula they’ll be millionaires within a year. It baffles me why people still believe this myth. Seth Godin in an interview recently said every successful person he knows took at least 7 or 10 years to get to where they were whether it was blogging every day or simply showing up and doing their thing, by the time they put their product out there, it went off because they did the hard yards, took the time to establish their reputation, positioning themselves for real success.This is why it is important to simply get started and build your online presence, start engaging and establishing those relationships from the GET GO! Even if you don’t have a solid business plan in place. Too many people spend way too much time on the sidelines thinking and analysing and not doing so when it comes time to launching they wonder why no one is buying their stuff within day 1.
I personally hate it when strangers inbox me to tell me about their awesome new promotion or business opportunity. This is a reason I don’t add people as friends on facebook unless there has been some former genuine connection. I may have been following them and liking their posts and contributing on their threads but that is not an invite to spam my inbox with offerings. I genuinely believe when people are ready to work with you, they will come to you. And until that happens, give them the space to discover more about you in their own time. If you have things set up properly, they will figure out where to get the info they need. Let me share you a couple of stories.

Excited and naive to the world of Online Business, 3 years ago I remember a kind lady, mother of a young family messaged me about a business opportunity.

At the time I didn’t know about network marketing or pyramid business models, none of that. So eagerly I got on a call with her. She even sent me an inspirational book. I thought, how thoughtful. Towards the end she managed to get my Credit card details. I hesitated for a few moments before I told her I needed to think about it. She said, I will just keep your credit card details “Just in case“. Later in that week, I had a discovery call with this coach who I thought was the Queen B of coaching. A year later I would discover how she ripped off a friend of mine (I have heard so many stories with many high-end coaches, another reason I don’t invest). She gave me very basic generic advice about marketing. It felt scripted and as if she had no clue about what I actually did. Little did I know at the time that was the way it was and still is, people would buy programs only to be given scripts and and a ‘so called’ proven formula. I’ve watched many unknowing, vulnerable and keen – up and coming entrepreneurs and business owners buying programs only to be in debt and disappointed when they really didn’t have to be but someone made them feel like it was the only way. I have no doubt, in some cases it may work. But I will never forget thinking to myself, she charges crazy dollars for her programs and everyone I know who has bought her program looks just like her. And what this coach offered was a basic template. And I don’t want to be basic. F$%* that.

From that moment on, I knew how I didn’t want to do things but more importantly I never wanted to make people feel the way these two people made me feel. I had to forge my own path and build my own unique brand. And the only way I knew how was to stay true to me and go against the grain.
The not charging enough advice would have been perfect when I had just started my VA services. That year I was doing VA work full time, it almost burnt me out. No wonder I was busy, I was charging next to nothing and people loved it because I was offering so much value for almost nothing. It didn’t mean they valued me or my time. And that’s the difference. I have always believed what you charge is your business and if you seek advice and want someone’s feedback, specific questions will help you reach that goal. When this coach asked me what my goal was and I said to make $X DOLLARS per month, she simply said “Well, you’re not charging enough”. That’s it. It was just about the money. But I know it is so much more than that, it’s about how you package your offer and your entire business model and what you are comfortable with. So you can’t simply give that advice without understanding the person and their business first. These are lessons, you won’t learn unless you are in the arena experiencing it for yourself, working out what works and what doesn’t. The advice given was not enough. I want to know why not with carefully considered ways on how to make it better. Also, if you’re not comfortable with a certain price point, how the F*&^ will you be able to market what you do and sell it. Also the price you set does not have to be fixed for life. You’re the boss, you get to decide when and how often you want to change the prices (just don’t do it too frequently).Some money coaches will argue “it is mindset” and “limiting beliefs” but when used in the wrong context, it can be just as manipulative as when they tell you “yes, you can afford my million dollar program” listing all the reasons that are preventing you from not investing. What about this popular one, “But if you really wanted it, you will find a way to get the money”.. Arghhh that one always gives me the shivers and in a bad way. It’s none of anyone’s business why you choose not to invest your money in something and no one has a right to bully you into it even if they may seem sweet, kind and spiritually inclined. Doesn’t mean their intentions are genuine.Don’t get me wrong, I would love to work with a coach and I am getting to the point where If I am to work with a business coach, I want to work with someone who shares similar values, and can give me more than generic advice and strategies that challenge my current approach, helping me to expand on what I already know, encouraging me to get the next level. I have my eye on a few.
It’s been like dating and trying to find the “right guy” – the struggle is real!

I’ve been in the online space now for 3 years, in business for 6 and running an online business for 2. Myself and my business(es) have evolved and changed form a lot during this period. And the skills and knowledge I have gained, priceless. Sometimes I wish I had someone to teach me what I know now but It’s hard to find the right mentor or teacher. Even if I had someone to give me a plan or strategy to put me in the right direction without having to invest in a yearly program would of been great.

No matter how much you can be taught, I’ve realised it does take time to discover and figure out what works for you and it is different for each person. It’s a journey that will test your patience and your determination to keep going. There is no ‘one size fits all’ rule as much as we are made to believe. And most of the time it comes down to trial and error and following the path that feels right to you, no one else.

Going against the grain can sometimes feel like you’re not doing things right, but what even is the right way anyway? Only you can decide that for yourself!

My biggest lessons in 29 years

December 2, 2016 IN Journal

So today is the day I launch this website, December 3rd 2016.

It’s also the day I turn 29 years old.

At 19 there was so much I thought I wanted to achieve and do by the age of 29. I thought I would be married, have children, a stable job and have my life sorted.

None of that happened except for the married part (but that didn’t go as planned). In fact I will be divorced before I am 30. Ha!
But I couldn’t be happier (right now at least but it was hard, really hard).
I was talking with a couple of my mastermind girls this morning about how we envision our life to be by a certain age, we place so much expectations and pressure to do certain things in a certain way. But why? I told the girls, now that I am older I am actually a lot more content within myself, I don’t feel the need to have X Y Z accomplished. To be honest I would be perfectly content to spend my days by the ocean in my own space doing my own thing with or without someone by my side. Of course having someone is a bonus but I am no longer concerned with any of that or how it supposed to be or look. I am happy enough just to do me (please don’t take that literally)

So I wanted to share with you 29 lessons I’ve learnt in 29 years:

Actions always speak louder than words. Anyone can say anything but its what they do that matters.
Putting yourself first is not being selfish. It’s necessary.
Two people can love each other heaps but still there is always work to be done.
It takes time to really get to know someone and build a solid foundation.
Sometimes people are going to leave and you will never understand why and that’s okay, let them go.
The most important relationship you can have is with yourself.
Its always important to do it for you first.
It’s not your job to make others happy, It’s your job to make yourself happy and that starts from within.
It’s not what happens to you that defines you, its how you respond to the situation.
There are always going to be challenges and failures along the way, you can’t avoid it.
As long as you can learn from your lessons, it’s unlikely going to repeat itself.
The universe throws you challenges to teach you something or see if you are actually listening.
Always listen to the tiny whispers of your soul, its actually trying to tell you the truth.
You are actually a lot more stronger and powerful than you realise
Some people are going to feel uncomfortable or intimidated by how much you have evolved. Don’t worry about it.
As you embark on this journey of self-discovery, you will feel lonely. You will so badly want the rest of your friends to be there by your side supporting you. But they will have their own journey to follow. And that’s okay.
Calories actually don’t matter. It’s the quality of the food that matters. But it doesn’t matter if you enjoy a donut here and there.
Coffee is good. In healthy portions
Just do what feels good. You don’t have to compromise your soul.
Your heart and soul are your best assets. Treat them with respect.
Surround yourself with those who raise the vibes higher.
It’s okay to say No.
You’re mum is actually always right. Don’t even try to argue with her.
It’s the women around you that are actually going to help you get through some of the hardest periods in your life. Some of whom will become your sisterhood. Treat them well.
Even when at times it feels like the world is over, just remember all the things you can be grateful for. Start with the fact your not broke. Yet.
Raise your standards and get the F away from anyone who brings you down. It’s not even worth it.
Too much stress will kill you. Just don’t even bother.
Life is good and can be sweet. Just depends on what kind of lenses you choose to see it through
It doesn’t matter what life looks like. It’s how it feels that’s the most important part. Start there.

The last year has been an adventure. I am excited for the next one!

Happy birthday to me!

The Courage To Be True To You

October 21, 2016 IN Spiritual

“Be fearless. Have the courage to take risks. Go where there are no guarantees. Get out of your comfort zone even if it means being uncomfortable. The road less travelled is sometimes fraught with barricades bumps and uncharted terrain. But it is on that road where your character is truly tested And have the courage to accept that you’re not perfect nothing is and no one is — and that’s OK.”

― Katie Couric

Oh yes, sister AMEN!

Making decisions out of your comfort zone, outside of what feels “safe” always demands a lot of courage. But making the decision to stay put and not go on the round the world trip with your significant other and get married in Las Vegas can be just as courageous than simply going with the flow. Its courageous because you’re doing it for you and not for someone else.

My friend uses this analogy, “it’s like jumping from one lily pad to another”. You may not always see what’s beyond the lily pad directly in front of you, but it always has a way of leading you to the next and then the next. You don’t always see it but when you leap with trust in yourself and in your decisions you will always find a way. Sometimes it may lead you off your path but there is always a lesson involved that will get you back on track either way so really you can never fail.

Choosing to be true to who you are, is often the scariest of all and can be lonely sometimes but with time, your skin will grow thicker and you will gain a sense of freedom that cannot be surpassed

I still get confused sometimes with trusting myself but damn, it feels good. Once you get through the pain of transition, growth and change. Because there is always some level of pain and discomfort with any kind of transformation.

I used to be the type that used to over worry what others thought or felt about me. Once I got real with myself and started to be true to who I was and set boundaries around what was okay and what wasn’t, things really started to change. For the best. I created the space to go on an inward journey. And my confidence grew from there. And some have found it confronting to see this new version of me. It hasn’t been an easy thing to do. Remember, most people are uncomfortable with change. Whether It’s about them self or the things they can’t control.

Most people, are afraid to do things for themselves because they are worried it’s being selfish and what others are going to say or think. And often than not our biggest fears are reflected back to us.So if you are thinking “Who do I think I am”, don’t be surprised it will be repeated back to you by others. I’m here to tell you It’s not selfish to be selfish. In fact, It’s necessary. It’s true, you are going to upset and disappoint a few people but at the same time you will be creating space for what matters and for those who truly care about. Same time you are putting up appropriate boundaries to protect your mind and heart space so you can have the energy to focus on and do the things that feel good and are true to you without the influence of outside noise. Remember, everyone has their own truth. What’s yours?

The greatest act of courage is to be and own all that you are. Without apology. Without excuses & without any masks to cover the truth of who you truly are. To me, this is what it means to truly live The Untamed Life

The point I am trying to make is that, we can change our life and circumstances at any point. We just need to be connected to the source of why we want to make a change and hungry enough to do so.

I had a conversation with my mum, we were talking about how important it was to be true and how some find it confronting. She said people can find honesty really challenging. It does make sense. Being true, is not the easy path to choose. You will butt heads, and there will be people who won’t like it. Being fake is a lot easier in the short term but will ruin you from the inside out and come back to bite you later on. I talk about this story over on Huffington Post here.

You will go through some trial and errors along the way before you can truly appreciate the importance of being true to who you are and sometimes you won’t know what that it is until you’ve hit a few road humps.

Mantra: I give gratitude to all my experiences, good and bad for it has taught me the value of being true to who I am and the courage to know I can create the kind of life that truly lights me up